I figured I'd post something since it has been a while since we last did so. People who are "in the know" about our adoption efforts will ask Kim and me how everything is going, and if we have any news.
There is no news.
Sigh.
We are still waiting for the LOA (Letter of Approval) from CCAA (China Center for Adoption Affairs) The amount of time we have been waiting is still considered "normal." ("Normal" is a pretty broad window of time ... months!)
In the meantime, Kim is trying very hard to preoccupy herself with other activities. Our home-office is now neat and tidy. She's preparing next year's homeschool curriculum and lesson plans. If this LOA doesn't come soon ... our kids will just have to skip summer vacation and start school work!!
And I find myself worrying about silly things. I worry about what the impact of our (approximately) 2 week absence will be on our kids. The idea of being in China, and us missing them, and them missing us ... is something that bubbles up into my thoughts quite a bit. How will they cope when Mom and Dad are half a world away? I know my mother-inlaw is *the best* but ... how will I cope with being that far away from these 4 kids? Rationally, I tell myself that all will be well. But there's something about that idea that makes my Dad radar ping like crazy.
It's not an ureasonable thing to think about, I suppose. But, it is kind of like worrying about what you will have for dinner the Tuesday after next .... there are just a lot of things in between now and then that make the concern seem a little irrational.
And then I wonder what happens if this whole thing gets delayed longer and Kim and I end up travelling at Christmas time ... ping ... ping ... ping. Ping. PING PING PING PING! There goes my Dad radar again!
Pastor Rob says that worry is God's reminder to pray (See Phil 4:6)
I'm trying to take that to heart.
But there's thing pinging sound in my head ...
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As I watch the two of you travel on this journey, I have so much going through my head and heart for you. I know you are tired of waiting, tired probably isn't a strong enough word - but you are ready to go get Jonathan now, not later, not when the paperwork is finished or the process is finalized. I know Your hearts are longing to be with your son. I know you have fear for him, for yourselves, for your other children etc etc. There is so much that is unknown - to you - and it is frustrating you beyond what my words can describe since it is out of your control.
ReplyDeleteIf there was something you could do to speed this situation along you would have done it long ago. Since there is nothing you can do, you are forced into a place of waiting, wondering, worrying, wishing, praying, hoping, crying, and waiting longer.
This is part of Jonathan's journey home, and your journey to go get him. The Lord is not wasting time making you wait. You are being taught how to be the parents Jonathan needs. Allow yourselves to rest in His hand, and willingly stay there as long as He needs. And cry. And tell Him how you want him to hurry. And surrender. All of it. And rest.
We love you guys and are so blessed that you are openly sharing your journey with us. We are praying for you - all 7 of you!